Fangirl Style

August 26, 2015 § Leave a comment

Saori-Luna writes,

Hi! I have some concerns about fangirl fashion. I mean, I love my shirts. In fact, I paint my own shirts with designs of the things I love. But today while I was dressing up for work, I was thinking about how is not appropriate to go to work with shirts, and this makes me sad. So I wondered, how do you dress up “right” for work without losing your fangirl style?

Just yesterday I saw the MOST PERFECT X-Wing Cardigan for sale on HerUniverse, and I thought to myself, “Could I get away with wearing an X-Wing cardigan to work?” I talked myself out of it for now, but if a Millennium Falcon cardigan comes along, I’m a goner.

So I get it. I have an “I met Sebastian at the Pawnee Harvest Festival” T-Shirt, and I’ve only ever gotten positive responses from people. But do I show up to the office wearing it? No. There’s no reason to be ashamed of what you love. Yes, you can pair a tee with a blazer or buy inspired jewelry on Etsy or any number of tricks. But how do you dress like a fangirl that people take seriously? YOU UPGRADE.

A fangirl closet should reflect the entire rainbow of her personality. Yes, you’re goofy and passionate, but you’re also BAMFy and intimidating as hell. When I asked people on Twitter who their fictional fashion heroes were, here’s what they said.

Claire Underwood – *cue ominous music*

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Leona Lansing – Pearls are for giving zero fucks.

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Alicia Florrick – ALL HAIL DANIEL LAWSON

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Olivia Pope – Hella Coat Game

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Effie Trinket – Definitely wear this to your next job interview.

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Sharon Morris – Because some of us are ridiculous.

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And of course Queen of My Life, Diane Lockhart

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There are so many great websites for TV fashion. Possessionista is one of my favorites, because she IDs fashion and also provides you with cheaper knock-offs or similar styles. Or you can simply type “dress like [insert character]” into Google, and you’ll find tons of articles directing you to examples. It’s amazing how channeling your fave can help you conquer.

Don’t stop creating, and don’t stop unicorn trotting. But don’t be afraid to find a woman who can help you breathe a little bit of fire as well.

The OTP Channel

March 9, 2015 § Leave a comment

DaCupcakePanda writes,

Hi! I ship a load of stuff, but I don’t ship ANY OF THEM as much as Hayffie (Haymitch and Effie from The Hunger Games). Yes, I know what you’re thinking. “Eurgh, not one of those people. Hayffie doesn’t even WORK. It doesn’t make sense!” Well, I can’t argue with you because we all have our different opinions, but I believe they should be canon. My problem is that I need them to be together so much, I can’t think of anything else. When I go to bed, I imagine how they would kiss and say goodnight and blardy blar, so forth and so on. What can I do?

Is blardy blar the new Yada-Yada? I love it.

BUT WHAT CAN YOU DO?

jj2As fangirls sometimes we forget that people go to bed thinking about things other than what I like to call The OTP Channel. And the reality is that using your imagination is actually a brilliant way to end to the day. I put on an episode of my favorite headcanon, and within ten minutes I’m asleep. I’m not worrying about the day ahead or second-guessing my decisions.

There is brilliance in the blardy blar, DCP. Because you’re accessing your imagination more than the average citizen of Panem, there are all sorts of benefits that keep your brain nice and wrinkly. But the downside is that sometimes the OTP Channel is a 24-hour network. You’d rather watch Hayffie flirt than finish your homework or hang out with friends.

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In Catching Fire, Haymitch shares an interesting observation with Katniss and Peeta. From now on, your job is to be a distraction so people forget what the real problems are. And like the star-crossed lovers from District 12, your OTP does exactly that. They distract you.

Humans deal with anxiety in two ways. By distracting, and by engaging it. Neither tactic is bad as long as we use both of them. That means turning off The OTP Channel sometimes. So pastry bear, here’s what I recommend that you do.

Step 1: Pay Attention! Go 24 hours and make a note every time you think about your OTP. Where are you, what are you doing, who’s around you? What thoughts, difficult situations, or responsibilities might you be avoiding?

Step 2: Spend some time in your head. Pick a free moment and set an alarm for 5 minutes. Close your eyes, take a few deep breaths, and pay attention to your thoughts. Don’t judge yourself if they’re negative or they land on your OTP. Just neutrally nudge them aside and focus on breathing and your senses. This is called mindfulness.

Step 3: Make the odds be ever in your favor.  Start taking moments throughout the day where you’d think about your OTP and instead be mindful of what’s around you. Set a reminder on your phone if you have to. Making lunch, showering, sitting in boring staff meetings, and driving to the grocery store are all opportunities to look up and appreciate the sights and sounds around you. To pay attention to what’s making you stressed or worried and to be rational and solution-focused.

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aka the voice inside you who doesn’t want you to BAMF

Step 4: Reward yourself with headcanon. The fangirl is an expert at diving deep into her imagination to avoid the real life opportunities snapping their fingers in front of her face. But the fanwoman doesn’t hide behind headcanon. Instead it’s her treat at the end of a long day of BAMF-worthy conquering.

I don’t think you’re one of those people, friend. You’re one of my people, and we’re people who conquer, blardy blar and all. So stay alive, stay focused, and show them something they’ll remember.

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