January 19, 2016 § Leave a comment
World-Weary Woman writes,
My problem is that I no longer get excited about my favorite shows or ships coming back. Mostly because of all the negativity on the Internet these days and because I’ve always been on the outside looking in on the fangirls making friends and having fun. I don’t know if I can’t get excited for the return of The 100 because I’ve been burned so many times by other shows and fandoms. Or that I’m officially too old to fangirl and should just put myself out to pasture.
Any suggestions on how I can regain my fangirl flame?
Lots of people will tell you that cutting off from fandom is the best possible thing.
But guess what? I’M GOING TO GIVE YOU THE EXACT OPPOSITE ADVICE.
Any time you interact with other humans, be it family, work, or even fandom, you’re in an emotional system. When tension rises in a system, we sometimes do the following predictable things:
- Stir up drama
You don’t put yourself out to pasture when things get tough at work or school right? Being able to stay in contact with people, even when they’re a-holes, is a life-long skill. So why not grow and use that skill on the Internet?
Look at The 100. People are constantly jettisoning the hell out of camp when they can’t handle the emotions or they disagree with people. And how well does that usually work, hmm? It usually ends with explosions and apologies.
We don’t have total control over the fangirl flame. Sometimes it dies and nothing can relight the spark. But I do know this: we have the most fun when we jump headfirst with our eyes closed. When we choose to approach others and ask them share the story with us. We don’t have to fight, or flee, or even thrive on the drama. Sometimes we can just be.
Be the fanwoman your fandom needs to see. Focus on what brings you joy, and to hell with the rest.