I Saw It First

January 14, 2016 § Leave a comment


Sarah writes,

I’ve developed this issue with getting pretty possessive of my favorite TV shows and even celebrities. I’m glad when more people watch my favorite show, because that’s obviously good and increases the chances of there being more seasons, but I feel jealous whenever I hear people talk about it at school.

I watched the show I’m currently obsessed with since January 2014. After it’s been broadcast in my country here too in summer, more people know and talk about it.  I have this nasty possessive feeling of having known it first. I know the thing’s obviously not mine and that’s a ridiculous thought. Perhaps it has to do with my disliking people around here, because they’ve always given me a feeling of being out of place, so naturally I don’t want them to enjoy the same things I love?

The bottom line is that I can’t handle the amount of people who love my favorite things too and even though they’re all over the world and I’ll never see them all in one place, I feel like I’m being crushed.

OH GEEZ. You’re painting a portrait of me a month ago. Everyone on the Internet realized that Carrie Fisher was a badass, so naturally I had all this unicorn butthurt since  I’ve been crying about her for twenty years. I’m an only child, so sharing celebrities and characters can be a. . . challenge.


Unless you give birth to them, you’re never going to be the first person to realize that an actor is the greatest thing ever. But when you don’t interact with a lot of fans, you can feel like you were the Neil Armstrong of bouncing around in the glory of their talent. Jealousy is a very human emotion. What can you do about it? Not. much.

Sarah, you may never cure that initial pang of jealousy, but you can change the direction you move in spite of it. When you’re jealous of a colleague or a friend, that’s your signal to move towards them. To cheer them on. To see what they can teach you. Science tells that happy people are able to celebrate others’ successes. So roll out the confetti cannons.

The same goes for fangirling. Moving towards a new fan means getting excited with them. Living vicariously as they watch an episode for the first time. Crying about the same ships. Texting them Getty images they haven’t seen. And voila, you’ve formed a fangirl friendship.

So my advice to you is this. When you feel jealous, don’t trot around like a butthurt unicorn. Instead, toss your pride out the window and move towards the source of your green heart. Enemies turn into friends, and competition turns into collaboration when we’re willing to share what brings us joy. Also, who doesn’t need a squeebuddy?




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