What Makes a Fangirl?

February 8, 2016 § 1 Comment


Anonymous writes,

I love being a fangirl and I love fangirling. I watch tons of popular and obscure shows and I often dive in to the fandoms for those shows. My problem comes in the “variety” (for lack of a better term) apparent in my fangirling. I’ve never fangirled over a female character!

I keep lists for actors I’m a fan of and try to watch all their stuff, but never an actress. I worry something is wrong with me because I just can’t seem to connect with any female characters or actresses like all my friends do. Is this just a case of not watching shows with strong female characters? I’m way more of a horror/Sci-fi gal than romance and for a long time I just assumed that was my problem.

Hi Friend!

Look in the mirror. Now look back at the screen. THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH YOU.

Whatever the Internet, or trolls, or anyone else says, there is no definition of being a fangirl that extends outside of A) liking something a lot, and B) identifying as female. Honestly even the B part doesn’t matter either.

You don’t have to be a geek, or a music fan, or a fan fiction reader, or a sci-fi nerd, or a comic book fan, or a television watcher, or a slash shipper, or an anything shipper, or a lady admirer, or an Internet lurker to be a fangirl. If something or someone with or without vagina inspires you, then you’re doing it right, friend.

Do you really want to find a fictional lady? Or do you just feel like a lonely unicorn when you like a male character? If the first is true, I wouldn’t force yourself to love or obsess over any actresses. Let it happen naturally, like real love. Maybe some glorious BAMF will swoop in and steal your heart. Maybe she won’t. Maybe you’ll have strong female characters in your real life who don’t happen to be fictional. EVEN BETTER.

If your fangirl friends don’t understand, tell them you’re just adding a little variety to the group. Tell them they’re the strong female characters in your life. Who wouldn’t want to hear that? And if you still feel like the littlest, loneliest unicorn, then I suggest you search the Internet and find your tribe. Other fangirls like male characters! A LOT OF THEM. Dig through those tumblr tags. Follow people on Twitter or Instagram who have similar interests. Your people exist. You just have to shine a little light out there.

There is a wrong way to fangirl. And it has nothing to do with what you like. It happens when you sink under the weight of an obsession rather than letting it catapult you into a new chapter of your own story. Any time you feel inspired and happy and courageous and silly, then you’ve hit the mark. You’re doing it right. Don’t let anyone else say otherwise.



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§ One Response to What Makes a Fangirl?

  • Hey! I heard that your book was called The Fangirl Life. Lol I found that so funny because I used to write a blog called The Fangirl Life (shut it down because of school stress. D:) But that’s cool haha. Fangirls 5ever.

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